Moving right along....tonight was interesting because we talked a lot about loss and grieving and what that looks like in our own lives, and then how that manifests in children. Our trainer was talking about how with each horrible experience that happens to a child (while still with their birthfamily) a hole is created and they come to you with "holes" that need to filled up. We try as foster parents to close up or fill up those holes with love, comfort, affection, etc and just when they begin to trust you, someone(could be a family member or friend) knocks them off that ladder that they just started to climb. Every situation is different and every child will have different needs and those needs will have to be responded to in different ways.
For the next week we need to get things notarized, complete our radon test, and get fingerprinted, oh... and more homework..gotta love it right? Man...I thought adoption had a lot of steps and "stuff" to complete, but that is a piece of cake compared to all this stuff!! LOL!!!
Sharing the life experience of becoming foster parents to the least of these!
1 comment:
It is very true that the life with their birth parents causes many holes and pains that they are not even aware of. We are going through this right now with our 2 daughters. Our oldest (11) has had contact with her birth mother until recently when those conversations have caused her to have terrible behavior afterwards. She says now that she doesn't understand why things happened and how she should feel about her bio family. Our other adopted daughter (9) is going through a lot of the abusive memories and has big problems when we go to certain locations where things in her past happen. Of course we don't know that anything happened at this places until we are there and see problems. It is a long process for kids who have been through too much. I say all this not to scare you but to let you know that as much as you go through it is amazing to be the ones that get to help them to get through all of it. We still talk regularly to 6 of our foster children who have left us and moved on. They say that they have a special bond with us as we worked through so much with them. To help a child grow and move on is a real blessing.
It is a lot of work to become a foster parent but God will bless you for it and through it.
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