Friday, June 22, 2012

Blah...

I have no creative title for this post-lol!  That's pretty much how I feel.  The day after the staffing I was told that the Aunt/Uncle do not have a current home study and we were asked again to consider PG.  Turns out they do in fact have a home study but it expires in a few days and they will need new backgrounds.  There is a huge transition taking place in our county and it looks like backgrounds will be a long delay.  Lovely.  I want EVERY moment with Baby but at the same time if he's gonna leave, let's get this over with!  Baby has a weekend visit with them this weekend. :(   I don't even like interacting with that man for our 2 min transfers.     Seriously...it feels creepy.  God calls us to love everyone and I wish him no harm, but I sure do wish that Baby was not going to have to live with him!

We soooooo love Baby and want him to stay that hubby and I revisited the PG discussion.  I called a lawyer and we spoke for awhile.  She answered all my questions and gave us more to think about.  In the end it still is not right for us or Baby.  It stinks...it really does, but this is foster care.  I am SO GRATEFUL that God gave us Michael and the ability to adopt him before having to for through this harsh reality.

We have had Squirt for exactly one month today!  It is amazing how fast time flies!  After Baby leaves, we will of course still have Squirt, but we will be taking a break to grieve the loss before signing up for CrazyLand again!  We plan to do lots of fun things with the kids and just have one set of case workers/GAL/etc to deal with for a bit.  I'm ready for less stress for awhile!!

Squirt has a JR coming up next week, but I think I am going to stay out of that 3-ring circus for a bit...I wonder how many of the family will show up to that one.  Squirt has already been excused from court.  Whew...I'll just get an update later :)  I think I will try to make it his staffing though in a couple of weeks.  More (generally) seems to get accomplished at those anyway.


3 comments:

"Are These Kids All Yours?" said...

Here to support and grieve with you......so very hard. Emotions and the bonding that has happened......

Praying you through this!!!

Let us know of anything we can do!!

Diane said...

I feel your stress and your grief. This is the major downside roller coaster of foster care.

I had the opportunity to pursue PG once with Sweets, but I was resistant. I had all the downsides figured out. I wanted adoption or nothing. Today I wish I would have jumped on it. Her life would be so much better. Mine would be so much easier. Now that I'm almost through law school, I know so much more. I would love to talk with you and provide another perspective. It may still not be right for your family, but what if?

I don't see an email address and I won't put mine out on the web. I may be able to contact you through your sister if you want to talk.

Diane

Our Journey said...

Thanks Diane....You can email me at fostermommam@gmail.com. :)