Longer story if you are interested :).....
When I arrived I was the first one there. After awhile bio-Dad walked in. Baby wanted NOTHING to do with him. I tried to encourage him to go over to him, but he would not. He clung to me and refused to get down. I got up and walked over to Dad and sat with Baby near him and he threw the LOUDEST tantrum ever and refused to be near him! Well that just put Dad in a sour mood and rather than scooping him up or trying to have Baby warm up to him he ignored him, refused eye contact, and you could tell he was downright ticked off. WHAT DO YOU EXPECT????
We ended up waiting for 1 1/2 hours past our court time to see the magistrate only. Right then and there I knew NOTHING was going to be decided today. Uncle showed up with Baby's siblings and made himself look good (or he at least tried to put a little effort in today!) He said "Hey man what's up?" to Baby and for the rest of our wait time he talked to a friend he drug along and on his phone while I babysat his kids on the other side of the waiting area. Nice...
So in court the drama was mainly centered around discrepancies in Bio-Dad's story and the CM's story. Her poor skills were shown clearly in court today. I almost felt bad for her! I don't know how many times the magistrate had to rephrase what seemed to me to be a very straight forward question-lol! She was ticked...that was clear!
At the very end Baby started crying and getting loud so we were asked to leave the courtroom (again...pointless for him to be there). I was told later by the GAL and CM that Uncle chimed in and said "Umm I thought we were here to talk about Baby's placement and having him moved to our house since we have his brother and sister" He then asked everyone to go around the room and state what they thought to be best. I CANNOT even believe the magistrate entertained this nonsense! The CM had no opinion until after the TPR consult (Friday) but the GAL spoke up and clearly said he should stay with us!! :) Uncle I'm sure was mad because he got all dressed up and brought kids to court to look the part and got a waste of time in return!
Oh and as for visits...they are to remain unsupervised however if he has a positive test OR misses any screens he will go back to supervised visits. This all of course because creatine is naturally occurring in foods, blah blah! Yeah...I do not like Dad's lawyer...he was the same one who fought for the nonsense with Michael's Bio-Dad! I understand he's doing his job, but seriously??? How does he sleep at night??? :(
From here (I feel like I need a flow chart!)....after the TPR consult we will know if we can fight for TPR. If so and we get it then we will hopefully be chosen as his adoptive family (aunt/uncle could still be chosen). If no TPR can be fought for then the will do a pretty quick turn around to move Baby to aunt/uncle for PG. Uncle has the option of filing a motion to get Baby moved asap...not sure if he will do this or wait for the TPR consult results.
So....I am counting today as a VICTORY because Baby is still in our home with no immediate move date in sight....yet. KEEP PRAYING FOR US!!!!!!!!!!!! I leftt with Uncle and Bio-Dad talking about their issues and honestly I could have cared less....so I said goodbye and walked out. I couldn't stomach listening to Uncle's excuses for not being in Baby's life until 3 months ago and I am sooooo tired of listening to Bio-Dad whine about how nothing is done for him. Sometimes I feel like saying "suck it up big guy! We have to get jobs, pay bills, and pay for a house by ourselves...I think you can do it too!" I know...that's not showing compassion at all, but sometimes you gotta stand on your own two feet and be responsible!!
3 comments:
Melissa- PRAYING!!!! I know we have said it a million times, but this is hard and it isn't even our case. I know God is in control, but it is sooo much easier said than done. JUST PRAYING AND KNOWING that God will grant your family peace with it.
But for now YOU HAVE HIM!!! Praise God!!!!
you are completely correct in your last statement! It's not compassion to enable someone. It's compassion to assist, if that is accepted, but enabling just keeps people in the pit they are in, that's cruelty, not compassion! I hope God intervenes and makes whatever is best for Baby happen. I know what "I" think is best, and that is that he stay with you - but, I'll still pray for what GOD knows is best because I know that is your hearts desire. God bless you!
That's so frustrating! It's so difficult to find a balance between being compassionate and letting bio parents stand on their own two feet. I would love to hear your opinion on foster parents in court (I'm actually a foster sister), since I just wrote a post about the topic the other day: http://nuggetsfromthenuthouse.blogspot.ca/2012/06/court.html Praying for permanency soon!!!
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