This afternoon we dropped Bean off at his new foster home! We were excited to hear that he would only be about 10 min. from us. I asked if we could drop him off so maybe that would ease the transition a bit...of course the CM didn't mind not driving 45 min to our house!
Bean went right to his new FM and she gave him some cheese and he was set! He was off and running and checking everything out, including the dogs...whew! I spent 1 min in the house dropping the stuff off and my breathing was messed up. That's some strong dog dander! Thankfully we hung out outside for a few minutes :) He will eat up being the only one there for awhile.
His new foster parents were blown away by the amount of clothes/diapers/wipes/etc that I brought with him! 3 of my friends graciously donated things to supplement what I was planning on sending and Bean is set for quite awhile! Baby sister will be joining him on Monday and they have very little for her, so they were so excited to hear that one of those same friends has baby girl clothes for them as well! :) It's so fun blessing others. It makes me think of this verse...
Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act.
Proverbs 3:27
The CM on the case (whom I LOVE) called this morning to THANK ME for all that we have done for Bean and dealing with his skin condition and keeping him until a placement could be found. It was so refreshing! Last week I emailed her supervisor to tell him just how wonderful she is. You all know how much I think Baby's CM has messed things up for his case, so when I have a great case worker I will be sure to let him/her know and their supervisor!
So we officially are not accepting any new placements for now. I think breaks are SO important for foster parents/families. When we jump from case to case to case it's so easy to get caught up in foster care land! Especially after some of the circumstances with this last placement...we're ready :) Our lives revolve around when the CM needs to visit, when the GAL needs to visit, when the child visits his/her parents and/or family members, paperwork, etc. It's so easy to put our forever children and marriage on the back burner. So..if you are a foster family who doesn't take breaks...I believe you should! Even if it's only a week b/w placements.
SO....we are looking forward to some footloose and fancy free fun! Of course we still have Baby so foster care is still "here" for now (if we ever get a court date!) but it's easier for me to do things with the bigger kids with only one baby vs. two. We'll get refreshed and renewed mentally and physically and when hubby and I feel mutually "ready" we'll dive back in! The kids are excited to not have to share quite so much of Mommy and be able to go more places (easily!) Of course the oldest two are most excited that there is once again room in the far back seat! lol! I think taking breaks like this will also help to protect our kids from resenting foster care (and the kids that come into our home) because they won't feel like their needs have not been met and that life revolves it. Of course we will continue foster care b/c it's what God has called us to do and I believe we are teaching our children a very important lesson as we serve God in this way! :)
How about ya'll? Do you take breaks? Do you ever think about how your children perceive foster care? Has your marriage changed since starting foster care? (Just for the record hubby and I are doing well, but we want to keep it that way :) )
3 comments:
I agree!!! It can be very hard. No matter what it is emotional.
I am sure your children understand from a child's point of view....I would just always talk openly about it.
As far as the marriage- yes totally affects this area!!! It is a lot of extra demands, and you have to balance that with extra love and care....and decompressing! I WANT you to keep it that way too!!!!!!!
:)
What's a break, lol? Well you know we haven't taken breaks but we have come to a point that I think we are ready. Maybe just a week or two though. We went 14 months without a new placement (we had two come and stay that long) so while we still had the workers coming and going, it wasn't the craziness of "new" placements and all the different people who come along with them.
For me, I'd rather just jump right back in. It fills the "void" the previous placements left behind. At the same time, I definitely agree that you can get burnt out from all the craziness. I got a 1 hour glimpse of what it was like with just our 3 girls last week. I love my foster babies but you don't realize how "easy" things "could" be.
With that said though, God called us to be foster parents. I love it and I am willing to do this for Him for however long He calls us to.
Just read your blog from start to finish! I have my own "Moosie" right now, and it really helps to hear about the experiences of other foster parents :)
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